Tag Archives: Blood Lite III

Blood Lite III: Aftertaste edited by Kevin J. Anderson

Overview

Blood Lite IIITitle: Blood Lite III: Aftertaste
Author: Kevin J. Anderson, Jim Butcher, Joel Sutherland, Kelley Armstrong, Christopher Golden, E.S. Magill, Eric James Stone, Jeff Strand, Mark Onspaugh, Mike Baron, JG Faherty, Stephen Dorato, Jeff Ryan, Mike Resnick, Lezli Robyn, Will Ludwigsen, Heather Graham, Daniel Pyle, Nina Kiriki  Hoffman, L.A. Banks, John Alfred Taylor, David Sakmyster, Norman Prentiss, Don D’Amassa, Adrien Ludens, Chris Abbey, D.L. Snell, Ken Lillie-Paetz, Sherrilyn Kenyon, Lisa Morton, Brad C. Hodson, Lucien Soulban
In: Blood Lite III (Kevin J. Anderson)
Rating Out of 5: 4 (Really good read!)
My Bookshelves: Easy reading, Fantasy, HorrorShort story collections
Pace: Slow
Format: Anthology
Publisher: Gallery Books
Year: 2012
5th sentence, 74th page: As he sped thankfully along the country highway, Randall was so consumed with the desire to get to Golden Links Golf and Country Club as quickly as possible that he didn’t take note of the birds and the bees, he didn’t smell the intoxicating aroma of roses floating on the summer breeze and he didn’t see the bloodied man at the scene of the accident with a six-foot length of steel pipe protruding from his chest and a vacant look in his eyes, chewing on the neck of a panicked paramedic.

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Synopsis

The third book in the hilarious and horrifying national bestselling anthology series from the Horror Writers Association–a frightfest of sidesplitting stories from such “New York Times” bestselling authors as Jim Butcher, Sherrilyn Kenyon, Heather Graham, L.A. Banks, Kelley Armstrong, and many more! Horror fiction explores the dark side of human nature, often pushing the limits of violence, graphic gore, and extreme emotions. But with the popularity of shows and movies, such as “The Walking Dead,” “True Blood,” “Twilight,” “Buffy the Vampire Slayer,” audiences have demonstrated their love for the genre–especially accompanied with a dose of humor to tone down the terror.

“Blood Lite III: Aftertaste” continues to put the fun back into dark fiction, featuring a wide range of humorous and highly entertaining horror-filled tales. Edited by Horror Writers Association founding member and award-winning author Kevin J. Anderson, the stories vary in tone from wry to downright laugh-out-loud funny. Featuring such well-known horror writers as Jim Butcher, Sherrilyn Kenyon, Christopher Golden, and many others, this collection of tales is perfect for anyone who enjoys being entertained as much as they love a good scare.

Thoughts

I bought this book because it had two short stories from series that I’m reading. And then I figured that since it was an ebook, it was a good one to read before bed, instead of keeping my partner awake with the bedside lamp on. I’m still not sure of how I feel about this collection. It was certainly an easy read, but maybe not one that I will pick up again in a heart beat.

One of the things I really enjoyed about this book is the variety of tones and feelings that you can find throughout. Some stories are downright funny. And some completely terrifying. There are ads, tales and scripts. Every different style and story takes you on a completely different and unexpected journey. And it has certainly given me a lot of new authors to find out more about… if I had enough time to chase down every single one that is.

Although I won’t be rereading Blood Lite III anytime soon, I will certainly be getting the other two Blood Lite collections to expand my knowledge and enjoyment of the authors who like to write about things that go bump in the night.

 <- The Four Horsemen Reunion Tour Review Lucifer’s Daughter Review ->
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Mint in Box by Mike Baron

Overview

Blood Lite IIITitle: Mint in Box
Author: Mike Baron
In: Blood Lite III (Kevin J. Anderson)
Rating Out of 5: 4.5 (Amazing, but not quite perfect)
My Bookshelves: ComedyEasy reading, Fantasy, Horror
Pace: Fast
Format: Short story
Publisher: Gallery Books
Year: 2012
5th sentence, 74th page: “Well, Mr. Lovaas, I don’t know.”

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Synopsis

Mr. Lovaas wants to find the ultimate collectible, but when he does, he gets more than he bargained for…

Thoughts

This story gave me the goosebumps. It was grotesque, creepy and so open ended that you could imagine the villain coming for you in the dark of night. The fact that it featured a nerd who refused to leave his apartment and hunted for the epitome of horrifying collectibles… it somehow made it all the more creepy.

I don’t know if there is something in this story that highlights our obsession with immortality or our materialistic tendencies, but it feels like it lingers. Yet, mostly, for me, this story is riddled with goosebump-giving passages that make me cringe. And I’m kind of glad that it was just a short story.

 <- Let That Be A Lesson To You Review The Great Zombie Invasion of 1979 Review ->
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The Great Zombie Invasion of 1979 by JG Faherty

Overview

Blood Lite IIITitle: The Great Zombie Invasion of 1979
Author: JG Faherty
In: Blood Lite III (Kevin J. Anderson)
Rating Out of 5: 4 (Really good read!)
My Bookshelves: ComedyEasy reading, Fantasy
Pace: Slow
Format: Short story
Publisher: Gallery Books
Year: 2012
5th sentence, 74th page: What’s that you said?

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Synopsis

A pair of rednecks come across what they believe is a zombie invasion… what could possibly go wrong?

Thoughts

This story was kind of weird, uncomfortable, and funny all at the same time.

In case you can’t tell, I had very mixed feelings about it. It was entertaining, but kind of rude towards others. It was a little predictable that the two main characters acted in the way that they did. But, still quite funny. The innuendos and sly little comments throughout also made this amusing. And gross. And weird.

And did I mention mixed feelings?

 <- Mint in Box Review Dating After the Apocalypse Review ->
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Let That Be A Lesson To You by Mark Onspaugh

Overview

Blood Lite IIITitle: Let That Be a Lesson To You
Author: Mark Onspaugh
In: Blood Lite III (Kevin J. Anderson)
Rating Out of 5: 4 (Really good read!)
My Bookshelves: ComedyEasy reading, Fantasy
Pace: Fast
Format: Short story
Publisher: Gallery Books
Year: 2012
5th sentence, 74th page: SO, YOU WANT TO BE A DEMONOLOGIST?

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Synopsis

Sometimes you mess up and summon a demon. Sometimes it takes a book to get out of it… or not.

Thoughts

After the first few pages of this, I thought that I knew where it was going. An unexpecting apprentice accidentally summons a demon… the demon gains the upper hand… the apprentice is trying to find a way out of it. Hence, the book of lessons. However, like all good short stories, there is a twist at the end that made me laugh. It also left me feeling a little perplexed and confused. I think I understand it, but I’m really not 100% sure.

Something about this storyline has lingered and made me wonder / think about what really happened. Was he the demon? Was she? Who needed rescuing from whom?

 <- Scrumptious Bone Bread Review Mint in Box Review ->
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Scrumptious Bone Bread by Jeff Strand

Overview

Blood Lite IIITitle: Scrumptious Bone Bread
Author: Jeff Strand
In: Blood Lite III (Kevin J. Anderson)
Rating Out of 5: 4.5 (Amazing, but not quite perfect)
My Bookshelves: ComedyEasy reading, Fantasy
Pace: Fast
Format: Short story
Publisher: Gallery Books
Year: 2012
5th sentence, 74th page: I was as strong as that damn giant on the beanstalk.

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Synopsis

Some people take baking a little bit too far. And taxidermy. And helping out friends. Really, the title shows you how disturbed this short story will be.

Thoughts

This story is incredibly disturbing. And funny. And humorous. But mostly, just disturbing. After all, it’s about a man who decides that he really wants to try bone bread. And a creepy taxidermist. And really, when the opening paragraph is about how much the character loves dead things… you know that this is going to be kind of sick and twisted.

I loved the backdrop of Jack and the Beanstalk to this story and how it’s giant informs the gruesome tale that follows. Alright, it’s still incredibly sick and twisted, but it makes the story more fun. And far more twisted with the contortion of a well known fairy tale.

 <- Nine-Tenths of the Law Review Let That Be a Lesson To You Review ->
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Nine-Tenths of the Law by Eric James Stone

Overview

Blood Lite IIITitle: Nine-tenths of the Law
Author: Eric James Stone
In: Blood Lite III (Kevin J. Andreson)
Rating Out of 5: 4 (Really good read!)
My Bookshelves: ComedyEasy reading, Fantasy
Pace: Fast
Format: Short story
Publisher: Gallery Books
Year: 2012
5th sentence, 74th page: Gordon frowned.

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Synopsis

How does a ghost find a way to keep his house from being haunted? Well, posession is nine-tenths of the law…

Thoughts

A ghost walks into a lawyers office. It honestly just sounds like the beginning of a really bad joke. And, honestly, with the tone of the Blood Lite III collection, I was kind of expecting a really, really bad joke. Something about how lawyers are zombies zapping the life (and money) out of the world. But, although this point is kind of hiding in the story, it’s more about the law of possession.

I also liked the twist at the end of the tale – possession, ghosts and zombies collide in a way that made me laugh and be constantly entertained. The conclusion left me smiling and giggling for at least five minutes after I turned the last page.

 <- Devil’s Contract Review Scrumptious Bone Bread Review ->
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Put on a Happy Face by Christopher Golden

Overview

Blood Lite IIITitle: Put on a Happy Face
Author: Christopher Golden
In: Blood Lite III (Kevin J. Anderson)
Rating Out of 5: 4 (Really good read!)
My Bookshelves: ComedyEasy reading, Fantasy
Pace: Fast
Format: Short story
Publisher: Gallery Books
Year: 2012
5th sentence, 74th page: He’d asked the demon Polichinelle for his heart’s desire – to be the funniest clown in the circus.

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Synopsis

Benny wants to be the funniest clown in the circus, but how far will he go to achieve his dreams?

Thoughts

We all know the quintessential class clown. Some people think they’re funny. Some think they’re irritating. Some just ignore them. But, regardless of our approach to such people, we all have a memory of someone who, at the very least, thought that they were funny (and in some cases, were).

Benny, the hero of this short story is one such person – a class clown. Who eventually becomes a clown. And then makes a deal with the devil…

As with all of the short stories that I love, there was a surprise ending. And, it left me laughing quietly, in a slightly sick, sadistic, twisted kind of way…

 <- V Plates Review Devil’s Contract Review ->
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Devil’s Contract by E.S. Magill

Overview

Blood Lite IIITitle: Devil’s Contract
Author: E.S. Magill
In: Blood Lite III (Kevin J. Anderson)
Rating Out of 5: 4 (Really good read!)
My Bookshelves: ComedyEasy readingFantasy
Pace: Slow
Format: Short story
Publisher: Gallery Books
Year: 2012
5th sentence, 74th page: This Agreement sets forth the entire understanding of the parties and may not be modified except in writing executed by both parties.

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Synopsis

Are you ready to make a deal with the devil? Here’s the contract!

Thoughts

I hate signing contracts. They’re legally binding, and either too boring or convoluted to read. Which is exactly the fear that this short story (of a sort) taps into. Actually, the thing that I loved most about this short story is how witty it is. And how much it taps into our approaches to contracts and legislation. And the global take over of some big companies…

This is truly a devil’s contract and I giggled the entire way through it. Software and technology is the backbone of society today, and it would be incredibly easy (and often imagined) to take over the world using our dependence upon it.

Although I found this story incredibly funny, I also found it a little worrying. It is almost a satirical comment on how we approach the world and a warning against what can become of us and our society.

 <- Put on a Happy Face Review Nine-Tenths of the Law Review ->
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Blood-Red Greens by Joel A. Sutherland

Overview

Blood Lite IIITitle: Blood-Red Greens
Author: Joel A. Sutherland
In: Blood Lite III (Kevin J. Anderson)
Rating Out of 5: 4.5 (Amazing, but not quite perfect)
My Bookshelves: ComedyEasy reading, Fantasy
Pace: Fast
Format: Short story
Publisher: Gallery Books
Year: 2012
5th sentence, 74th page: If we get caught we’ll be in big shit.

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Synopsis

Errol and Randall decide to play their weekly game of golf together… in the middle of a zombie apocalypse!

Thoughts

I really wasn’t expecting a zombie apocalypse story when I started reading this. Mostly, I was expecting a vampire story. Or something about a vampire wanting salad… you know…

That’s not to say that I wasn’t pleasantly surprised. When you take a boring game like golf and add in psychotic zombies, I’m going to enjoy the tale. After all, there are so many theories about the zombie apocalypse, and adding in such an entertaining dose of humour just made this a short story that was almost impossible to put down.

The other thing I loved about this story is the way that it came full circle. It started with Errol and Randall playing a tedious game of golf… and ended with them playing the same silly game (can anyone tell that I don’t enjoy golfing?)

 <- I Was a Teenage Bigfoot Review V Plates Review ->
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V Plates by Kelley Armstrong

Overview
Blood Lite III

Title: V Plates
Author: Kelley Armstrong
Series: Women of the Otherworld #10.6
In: Blood Lite III (Kevin J. Anderson)
Rating Out of 5: 5 (I will read this again and again and again)
My Bookshelves: Dark fantasyParanormal fantasy, Strong women
Pace: Fast
Format: Short story
Publisher: Orbit
Year: 2012
5th sentence, 74th page: I want your body.

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Synopsis

Losing your virginity is a serious thing for some, but it’s even more serious when you’re a werewolf in a zombie brothel.

Thoughts

I love when a non-Australian author writes about Australians and uses slang that we actually say. I’ve never heard someone say chuck a few shrimps on the barbie. For starters, we don’t call them shrimps, they’re PRAWNS! But, I have, and do use the term v plates to talk about virginity, and even told my friends that I’d lost my v plates when the time came. So just the title and the very beginning of this story worked well. Like I said, Armstrong actually managed to use Australian slang and characterisation in a way that was actually recognisable. And didn’t make us look like extremely backwards and uncultured swines.

Losing your virginity is a big moment in anyone’s life – for some it’s a passage into adulthood, others it’s an indication of your love, religion, something. In the case of Noah, it’s about not getting ribbed by his classmates anymore. The added issues caused by his slowed development and the fact that he’s a werewolf just make the moment and losing of his v plates a whole lot more difficult and serious. Hence Reese attempts to help him out. Which doesn’t actually work out all that well – after all, it wouldn’t be a great Women of the Otherworld story if there wasn’t chaos, mayhem and confusion left in their wake.

V Plates might be about Noah turning into a “man”, but it is also another great look into how much Nick has changed throughout the series. Instead of running from the problems with which they are faced and hand-balling it off to Elena and Clay, he holds his ground and tries to find a solution to their problems. He too has grown up, and I can’t wait to see what he does with this new maturity in the next series of stories.

<- Off Duty AngelAmityville Horrible ->

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